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The Santa Ana's Have a Bite

The Santa Ana winds are strong, extremely dry offshore winds that characteristically sweep through in Southern California and northern Baja California in late fall into winter. They can range from hot to cold, depending on the prevailing temperatures in the source regions, the Great Basin and upper Mojave Desert. However, the winds are remembered most for the hot dry weather (often the hottest of the year) that they bring in the fall.

I lived here 12 years and I have to say California has some weird weather trends. When I got here all anyone could talk about was El Nino. I thought if it's El Nino in Los Angeles then it was El Nino in Michigan all the time but no one talked about it. Just to give you a sense of how crazy Southern Californians are about anything other than sunshine....When it rains, you'd think a tropical storm is a comin'. Newscasters are quick to put their Weather Alert '09 label at the bottom of TV screens for what literally amounts to a few sprinkles (and I am not talking cupcakes). It's very silly really. I don't get it. For years now I have been hearing about these Santa Ana winds and have not really given the term a second thought. But yesterday, those winds took my notice. Mostly because when I got out of work it was really windy and the wind was really hot. It was like God turned a gigantic hair blower on Los Angeles and set the setting to hot. It was the oddest weather sensation I have ever experienced and I have been in tornados and have experienced earthquakes (though the earthquake gets the scariest weather sensation award). I thought for sure my house would be an inferno but I literally left Hollywood and got into Eagle Rock and it was cool. It was like God read my mind that I just wasn't in the mood to be sweating it out in my house and turned the cool switch on the hair blower.

I wasn't so lucky today as those winds were still a little hot and they moved on to Eagle Rock. God, if you are having fun with your big hair blower in the sky, can I ask that you aim the blower at the stupid German Shepherd behind my house? Yes folks, that urgh... dog is back. I am not sure where the owners took the dog for all these months but someone has brought the dog back to the house and is allowing him to bark at the top of his lungs again. Though now he doesn't bark at 5AM. He lets us sleep one more hour and barks at 6AM. The owner must have changed his schedule. The hub has already written a note to the city. These people are stupid, ignorant, fools. I so want to go over there and yell at them but apparently they are not civilized as our continued attempts to reason with them don't seem to matter to them. I have no idea how they do not hear this dog bark. If I can hear it clear as day inside my house they have to hear it in theirs.

This reminds me, I need to make an appointment with the window man. Time to get triple, extra thick, doubly wide, windows panes. Maybe I should call up that psycho animal shelter woman who wouldn't let me adopt a dog and tell her that a German Shepherd is obviously not being treated well by my neighbors. Bite me neighbors for not being decent and while I am at it, bite me Santa Ana winds. Go wind it up elsewhere and take that dog with you.

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